The high road, part IV: Mind over cesspool

“Mom, when you do the right thing, you’re a good guy, and the good guys win, right?”

Gulp.

Jane’s question after her Brownies meeting gave me pause.

How could I answer her? How could I teach my 8-year-old that I believe in making the tough choices, even if some of the world doesn’t value character or decorum? How could I teach her that hard, honest work (physical and mental) pays off?

“Yes, honey. In our hearts the good guys will win,” I answered. 

Running on flat ground is easier, and so is avoiding conflicts. Life is often not fair. People cheat and do crummy stuff and get away with it. (Think Bernie Maddoff. Yes, he got caught eventually but not before creating a lot of damage.)

I didn’t want to tell her this yet because no matter how lopsided things can feel, I still believe in navigating the high road. It builds our physical bodies and characters.

Demonstrating this in the real world, however, can be challenging. 

As a mother and athlete I struggle to find positive role models for Jane to emulate, especially younger female ones. Our internet-driven, anything-goes world is enamored with celebrities. And sometime it feels to me like the cesspool of humanity is the only thing rising to the top.

The other day I stumbled accidently on an internet segment of Serena Williams lobbing the f-bomb better than her tennis racquet at the U.S. Open in 2009.

Was that the high road? I wouldn’t say so, but I got sucked into viewing it like many other people.

I could digress more but what is the point? I can’t change people. With newspapers, readers often gravitated to headlines of “bad news” even when they complained about them.
 
Today the same stuff gets high clicks. The format has changed but not human nature. By joining the blogosphere I hope to promote some civility again, whatever comes from this blog.

I remember one of Jane’s teachers telling me it takes 10 positive comments to counteract one negative one dealt to a child so the good strokes, just like hill work, are worth doing. 

The only thing I can do is be my own word. I don’t reward bad behavior in my children and I make a point to avoid similar content when I can.

Hills take mental and physical strength and so do the tests of our everyday ethics and humanity. Both are worth mastering to me. That’s what I will tell her as she grows up.

When I see a hill on my running path I pick a benchmark to reach. I repeat to myself, “You can do it. You can do it.”

I give myself an “attagirl” when I get there and then shoot for the next benchmark. By breaking the hills into workable parts I summon my strength and courage.

Likewise I strive to make ethnical choices. I’m no saint and I do the best I can. It may not get me rich, but usually I can sleep with my conscious at night.

The other day a friend asked my advice when dealing with her own conflict. I told her it never hurts to take the high road. The next day she called to thank me.

We grow when we face the bumps, not run from them. That’s how winners climb to the top.

And that’s what I will remind Jane and myself.

Aging is inevitable, but growing old is a choice. Lace up your shoes, and let’s go.

Mileage yesterday: 10; Denver to Boston miles logged: 830.5; Miles left to go: 939.5.



One thought on “The high road, part IV: Mind over cesspool

  1. Thanks to you and ‘Jane’ for today’s post. You inspired me to tackle my hill workout today. I agree that the high road doesn’t always put you ahead, but you can rest at night. You are approaching the halfway point in mileage. What an inspiration!!!

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