Destination: Courage

Reposted from August 26, 2011

It’s amazing how the culture of celebrity affects us. It can even create
the allusion of kinship. That’s how I feel when I read articles about
superstar athlete Kara Goucher.

Although I’ve never met her personally (although I have met and
interviewed a few celebrity runners) I can’t help liking Kara Goucher
and her accomplishments. She comes off like someone you could chat with
over a Starbucks … at least in print.

It also helps that Kara and I, believe it or not, appear to have a few things in common such as ….

She’s the mom of young boy and so am I (“Tarzan,” my son, is a few years older than Colton, her son).

Her father, Mirko Grgas, who died in a car accident when she was 4 years
old, was born in the same country where both my parents were born.
(We’ve got the common gene-pool thing going.)

Her son’s middle name is Mirko, based on her dad, and “Tarzan” also got his middle name from his Balkan grandfather — my dad.

Kara Goucher, even though she’s a world-class athlete, has fought her psyche demons as a runner and worked hard to overcome.

OK, so I’m not an elite runner like Kara Goucher is, and never will be,
but I do know how a crisis of confidence can undermine one personally.

I’ve done it a lot, too.

For me it’s usually my head that gives out when I race. Just ask my friend Pam.
 
I will never forget the conversation she and I had after my first two
attempts to qualify for Boston and failing. Everything in my physical
training plans had gone well and pointed to my ability to do it.

“It’s your head that’s messing with you now,” she told me.

I needed to BELIEVE I could do it.

Although I’d done ALL the long runs, and intervals, and tempo runs, and
weeks and weeks of training — my head was the missing element and
holding me back.

It took incorporating mental training for me to qualify for Boston
finally on that third try. The mind allows wants to quit before the body
and it will if you let it.

This is also why I respect Kara Goucher. A few years ago she opened up about her own mental crashes and burns in a Runner’s World motivational article, “Mind Gains.”

Until I read that interview I thought it was only me who sabotaged
myself mentally during a race. It helped to know that it even happens to
Kara Goucher. The tips in that article helped me to refocus.

I wish I could say, “Poof! Magic! I don’t do that anymore!”

The truth is … it’s a constant battle. Some people are prone to
physical injuries when they race. I wrestle with myself internally.

These days I’ve been standing at a similar point where I was after
trying to qualify for Boston and failing the first few times. After
getting sick with shingles and not running as much lately my confidence
has been as wobbly as a lopsided table.

To shore up my battered psyche I’ve been using visualization techniques
(seeing the finisher’s clock with the time I want) before I go to sleep
and mantras when I run:

“You WILL get over this wall before you leave this obstacle course, sugar britches!”
(Yes, I saw re-run of “Officer and A Gentleman” the other night. Now the line won’t leave my head!)

I re-read that Runner’s World article about Kara Goucher for
inspiration and I’ve been following the great things some of my friends
have been doing lately — Katie, Jane, Michele and Pat — whom I
mentioned in posts a few days ago.

It took courage for Katie to return to the Leadville this year and slay 100 MILE BEAST!

It also took courage for Jane, Michele and Pat to look into the abyss of
that ultra (the TransRockies race), face the unknown and conquer the
epic challenge before them.

In two weeks I will race again myself — the Pocatello Half Marathon.
Although it’s not the mega-mileage those women did I’m seeking a PR.

I REALLY want it and my heart and head could use it. It’s possible if my
confidence and courage can cooperate instead of spare with each other.

There’s a great quote by Henry Ford that keeps going through my mind:
“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t — you’re right.”

Things worth achieving are also worth the risk of failure, I believe.

Kara Goucher has learned that one the hard way.

So have I.

Please send good vibes my way because pretty soon …here I go again. I’m going for it.

Big-hair music from my past to fuel my badass dreams in the present.

###

Aging is inevitable, but growing old is a choice. Lace up your shoes, and let’s go!

Mileage today: 5; Mileage since Boston: 470.3.


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